“Your emotions are always on your side”

Our emotions are probably the most misunderstood and under researched subjects that psychology is still just flirting with.

When we start researching our emotions, few problems arise.

First, each emotion is a subjective experience, what you experience can be unique to you.

Second, just because we don’t have names for certain sensations we don’t have a name for that emotion, we are emotional illiterates, and we cannot differentiate it from its similar relatives.

Third, we cannot measure emotions except by looking at physical or chemical changes in our biology. If you want to dive deeper into the world of emotions, psychology and psychiatry, you can read these articles.

But even though science is limited, the emotional world is far from unexplored. Here are the 3 biggest facts that will change how you see emotions.

3 Surprising Facts About Your Emotions:

1. If you go against your emotions for too long, you will start to feel sick of everything.

We all have such moments.

You are inspired, motivated, you plan doing so many things and then poof… no more motivation, no inspiration, you hate your plans and to do lists.

You just want to lie in your bed all day and watch movies.

Why this happens, is there something wrong with you?

The short answer is:

No, nothing is wrong with you!

The long answer is this:

Your emotions are like waves, they come and go, they have peaks and lows, ebbs and flows.

One moment you can feel motivated and then that motivation can go away as quickly as it came.

That’s why you should avoid depending on emotions.

They are messages, not your main goal.

So when motivation comes, when you are inspired, use that energy to do something about it.

Do it then and there, take at least one step. Do not wait.

Because these emotions will be gone sooner or later and all you are going to be left with is your progress.

That’s the reason why you feel sick of everything.

When you are motivated you make plans, and when the motivation is gone all you are left with is your to do list.

When your body is in need of rest you are requiring it to work.

You are going against your own tide. And you hate it.

Remember this next time when you feel motivated.

2. The moment you stop wanting to feel better, you feel better.

Most of us seek to feel good, but rarely who is good at feeling.

We suck at feeling.

For everything else we are intellectuals, the most evolved species on the planet.

But when it comes to emotions, we are dumber than animals.

They can at least feel fully, we escape.

And as we escape, we stuff down all the emotions we do not want to feel.

We chase the “good” emotions and run away from “bad” emotions as far as possible.

But we do not realize that YOU CANNOT RUN AWAY FROM YOURSELF.

You can try, but wherever you go… guess who is there?

You are making yourself feel bad by trying to feel good.

Every time you chase something, you are pushing it away.

And every time you avoid something, it follows you like a shadow.

So instead of trying to feel better, learn how to be better at feeling.

Embrace all the emotions, stop escaping.

Allow yourself to feel whatever arises.

And then, let it flow.

You will see that as soon as you stop forcing your nature to fit in your limited mind’s preferences, you will feel better.

Start now! Don’t chase feelings. Surrender. Feel the emotions.

3. You are often happier when you do good to others than when you do something good for yourself.

You hear all around you, “don’t be selfish!”

But the problem is not in being selfish, it’s in being limited by your self.

If all you care about is Your Self, that’s the problem.

You should realize that you are not renting a private apartment here on planet Earth.

This is a hostel and we all share a room.

The world is bigger than you and we are all fighting some kind of battle.

We are all one.

That’s why when you do something good for someone else you usually feel much happier even than them.

It’s a natural rewarding mechanism that reinforces the belief that says you are a good human being.

We love to be good, whoever we are. So doing good to someone else, we get “Good” points, and that feels amazing.

We love being a good person. We love it more than even doing something nice for ourselves. And that’s why we feel happier when we make others smile compared to when we do something nice for ourselves.

Everything you do benefits you one way or another, every good deed makes you happy, sometimes even happier than the person you helped. Every gift that you give is often more rewarding to you.

When we do good to others, we feel as if the whole world approves of us. When we do good for ourselves, sometimes we even feel selfish and judged.

However, the solution is not in being “selfless”.

It is literally impossible to be selfless.

If you are, you would not be alive.

The solution is in merging both.

Be Selfishly Selfless.

Make yourself feel good by making other people’s lives better.

There is nothing wrong with making your self feel good.

And at the end of the day, you don’t know whether your good deed leads the other person to more suffering or happiness in the long term.

Letting someone in front of you in the line might make them happy momentarily, but lead them to get hit by a car.

Not helping someone with their exam might lead them to learn the subject themselves and get college scholarship.

You cannot know, and it’s not your job.

All you should care about is to find that balance being selfishly selfless.

Do one random good deed today. Be selfish, help someone else so you can feel better.