Melissa S. O’Connell is one of the coaches that we found this month and we did a little interview with her. She impressed us with her creativity and passoin.
She is a seasoned professional whose journey embodies resilience, creativity, and a profound empathy that transcends boundaries. Hailing from the scenic landscapes of Oregon, she pursued a path in Communications before delving into the corporate realm. Yet, beneath the veneer of success there was a dormant passion, a longing to nurture creativity and connect with others on a deeper, more empathic level. It was this innate empathic gift that shaped her trajectory, propelling her towards a profound realization: the power of empathic coaching to heal souls and unlock untapped potential.
She went from a childhood stifled by societal norms to carving a niche as a beacon of empowerment. She found solace and purpose in guiding fellow empaths. Armed with insights gleaned from personal struggles and professional triumphs, her coaching approach intertwines corporate pragmatism with soulful introspection.
She has a unique methodology. As we were interviewing her, it became evident that this isn’t merely coaching, it’s a transformative journey towards embracing authenticity, setting boundaries, and reclaiming one’s innate power. Here is what she said.
Name: Melissa S. O’Connell
Pillar: The Spirit, The Mind, The Heart
Who is this coach for: Business empaths who want to establish healthy boundaries, discover and embrace their real potential, and live the happiest version of their life.
How they can help: By using various tools and techniques, focusing on their energy and their energy management, establishing healthy habits and boundaries, as well as using many technologies to make the coaching process easier.
It was a tricky time for us, my now 9 year old daughter was just finishing her last year of pre school and then moving into Kindergarten, so this presented a host of concerns including how schooling virtually, wearing a mask and hearing about the fear around the pandemic would affect her.
Luckily, she had a pod of friends that she could still physically play and interact with, so we tried to maintain as much of a normal routine and childhood as we could for her during that time.
We do appreciate though, how the pandemic changed the way we work, especially in the corporate world.
At the time, I was a Director of Ecommerce, so being in digital and tech made it easy to work from home during quarantine, an allowance that then continued after the pandemic ended.
My husband on the other hand works in finance, where there is a more traditional view on how their employees work, including working onsite and putting in long hours.
This obviously had to change during the pandemic and in lock down, somewhat breaking down those strict requirements.
Post pandemic he is able to work a hybrid schedule with three days in the office and two days at home, which means we have more family time together and he isn’t as tired or run down thankfully.
I currently coach Business Empaths and do feel Empaths were deeply affected by the pandemic.
Empaths absorb the energy of the people and situations occurring around them and it’s an ability that we can’t just “turn off”.
The energy of panic, fear, uncertainty and isolation we were exposed to as Empaths during the pandemic from the news, social media, our communities and families, was completely overwhelming.
Many Empath’s including myself, retracted into themselves and their own little life bubbles, in order to minimize the amount of energy they absorbed and that was drained from them.
Empath’s do like to step away from the busyness of life to relax and recharge, but while we all did have to step away from our old lives during the pandemic, being on constant high alert meant that we could never really relax and re charge during that time, resulting in feeling completely drained and exhausted.
The little bright spots during the pandemic for me as an Empath, were that I had my little family more closely around me, that life did slow down to a more manageable pace… for a while at least, and that I found hope in the way that I saw our and other communities taking care of each other during that uncertain time.
There’s a great quote by Wayne Dyer (one of my inspirational, thought leader heroes) where he said:
“When you squeeze an orange, you’ll always get orange juice to come out. What comes out is what’s inside. The same logic applies to you.”
So I’d say the lesson I learned or was reminded of during the pandemic, is that there is still humanity and empathy in our world.
I was just so thankful to see that in that scary, uncertain time, kindness, love, collaboration and community were some of the biggest characteristics that came out of people and that they exhibited with those around them.
I grew up in Oregon, where I went to college at the University of Oregon and majored in Communications from the School of Journalism.
Directly after college I moved to New York City where I began my career.
I went on to spend 20 years in the corporate world, working in E commerce, Digital Operations, Technology, Change Management and Advertising, for companies like Kate Spade New York, Macys, Bloomingdales, Wiley, Coldwell Banker and BBDO NY.
I was born an Empath and was highly creative and sensitive growing up.
Out of college I went into Advertising to have a creative based career and ended up in the Digital and Technology space.
Along the way though I used my empathic abilities, creative problem solving skills and my way of naturally connecting with others, to not only learn and grow in my many roles, but to also help and mentor others like me, who were on my own teams or were my colleagues.
This inspired me to want to lean even more into helping other in this way, so I began learning about the world of Life Coaching.
In 2016, a year after my daughter was born and while still in my corporate career, I decided to get my Life Coaching certification from the Integrative Wellness Academy.
From there, I founded my Life Coaching business “Creative Girl Helping the World” and I pull from my work experience, coaching skills and empathic abilities to help my Empath clients navigate their life and work, guiding them to embrace and share their gifts, and stay positive, productive and profitable along the way.
Growing up I was very creative and wanted to pursue a career in the arts: painting, dancing, singing, acting, etc. Unfortunately, I wasn’t encouraged to do so by those around me, I was actually discouraged from it, probably out of an intent to protect me as I was such a sensitive child.
However, this lack of support and discouragement from following my initial childhood dreams really caused me to doubt and question myself.
To this day, I know it made me shrink and be afraid of pursuing the creative things that I really loved.
Getting back to my true creative self, in spite of what I went through as a child, has been the biggest obstacle I’ve faced in my life.
Becoming a Life Coach and helping others like me, has been really healing here, as has been being a mom to my 9 year old daughter who, no surprise, is very empathic and creative herself.
My corporate career background required me to often walk into an un defined role or white space and build process and organization out of it, creating order out of chaos or the unknown.
This also included creating tangible processes and documentation to ensure that those teams and colleagues I was supporting could fully visualize, understand and then practice the new procedures, systems or knowledge that I was handing to them.
I use this approach in my Life Coaching as well by first helping my clients define their often unspoken or unrealized challenges and then creating coaching concepts around energy patterns, mindset changes, new habit guidance, etc. for my clients and ensuring there is also something tangible they can connect it all to.
This might be a checklist, a workbook, journaling prompts or a video guide to help them better visualize and understand the concepts they’re learning and to further internalize it all, for more effective application in their work, life and business.
One of the most important and life affecting abilities that Empaths have is their sensitivity to the energy of the people and situations occurring around them.
So one of the places that I always start focusing on with my Empath clients is their energy, we look at how they’re using it, where it’s being drained from them and how to improve their energy habits.
This always then leads us to the bigger issues they’re struggling with as Empaths, setting boundaries, people pleasing, over giving and overwhelm to name a few.
That’s where the real work begins, to untangle all of that and re create a life and business that leverages their empathic strengths, while helping them to resolve the obstacles they keep bumping up against as an Empath.
I’m uniquely qualified to help my empathic clients, because I’m an Empath myself and have been through and still face all of the challenges that they do in their life and work and as an entrepreneur running a business.
I help my clients to embrace their empathic abilities and then use these as strengths in their life and business.
A lot of times, Empaths (and myself included), feel that our abilities are a burden or that they make us ”different” or they cause us to feel isolated from others.
My clients focus on embracing these abilities as the gifts they really are, that can be celebrated and that need to be shared in their life and work.
As we’re establishing this, we’re also then unraveling bad habits like people pleasing, over giving, a lack of boundaries, etc. that have often been in place for their entire lives.
And as mentioned earlier, we’re also working with their energy (which is a valuable asset for Empaths) to ensure that they understand their own energy patterns and can arrange their life around those, as well as then discovering where and how their energy is being drained or uplifted.
The end result from all of this deeper work is that a Business Empath client begins to see and internalize the real and true value they have to offer as the unique person they are in their life and work.
And this manifests in many ways depending on the individual client.
For example, they can create happier, more authentic lives and businesses now, because they know how to manage their personal energy…
They can set boundaries around how people treat them, they know when to stop working and to rest so they don’t over give…
As well as they now feel confident in selling their services to clients profitably, instead of discounting their offerings, because they’re worried a client won’t like or want to work with them.
It all adds up to helping Business Empaths to embrace their unique gifts and stay positive, productive and profitable in their work and life.
My current Life Coaching “tech-stack” includes:
I believe that we all have something special to share with the world.
That we deserve to be supported and encouraged when following our dreams.
As well as that Empaths serve a unique purpose to show others how to feel deeply, love fully, live creatively and to bring a human touch to everything that we do.
Thank you so much Dejan and team for asking me to contribute here for Life Coach Code!
I’m honored and excited to be included in your movement to help people become the greatest version of themselves!
I believe that giving people outlets like these to create their own paths to learn and grow as human beings, is needed now more than ever in our world.
If you liked this interview and if you are an empath who would love to embrace their real potential, go to https://www.creativegirlhelpingtheworld.com and see how coach Melissa can help you.
Here is a recent podcast you can watch if you want to get a glimpse of her coaching:
And if you’d like to connect more personally with her, you can do that through Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, or by sending her a direct message on her Email melissasoconnell@gmail.com. It was an honor having this interview with her.
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