Sara was angry and frustrated when we spoke.
“I did everything I was told! I obeyed my parents, teachers, elders in the family, his parents. What did I get in return?? Broken dreams, abuse, shattered hopes, and unfulfilled promises. Getting away from him was almost as bad as living with him! So tell me Doc, Why do bad divorces happen to good people?”
Are you going through or have been through a divorce or breakup and asked yourself the same question?
Here are some ways to REthink that question!
As you know by now 😊 Life is ever changing as are relationships.
Sometimes, despite our best efforts, marriages unravel.
Infidelity, financial strain, or simply growing apart, the reasons are as varied as the stories themselves.
But amidst the chaos, there’s an empowering truth: we can choose how we perceive and respond to the situation.
It’s easy to slip into the role of the victim, blaming circumstances or our ex partner for the pain we’re experiencing.
While this is a natural response, it’s crucial to recognize that dwelling in victimhood doesn’t lead to liberation.
Instead, it’s a self imposed trap that hinders personal growth and healing.
Shifting our mindset is the key to breaking free from the chains of victimhood.
Here are some steps to guide the way:
Victim Mode: “Why did this happen to me? It’s not fair!”
Liberation Mindset: “I accept the reality of the situation. It’s a stepping stone to a new chapter in my life.”
Victim Mode: “I have no control over anything.”
Liberation Mindset: “While I can’t control everything, I can choose how I respond and shape my future.”
Victim Mode: “This is the end of my happiness.”
Liberation Mindset: “Adversity is an opportunity for personal growth. I will emerge stronger and wiser.”
Victim Mode: “I can’t forgive what they did.”
Liberation Mindset: “Forgiving doesn’t condone, but it liberates me from carrying unnecessary weight.”
Victim Mode: “I’m alone in this.”
Liberation Mindset: “I’ll lean on friends, family, or support groups. Connection aids healing.”
Victim Mode: “I’m a failure.”
Liberation Mindset: “I’m resilient and capable. This is a chance to redefine my life.”
Victim Mode: “I don’t deserve happiness.”
Liberation Mindset: “I deserve love and happiness, starting with self compassion.”
In the book of life, divorce may be a chapter, but it doesn’t define the entire story!
Bad divorces happen to good people, but how we navigate the aftermath shapes our future.
Choose liberation over victimhood, and the path to healing becomes a journey toward newfound strength and resilience.
If you are committed to it but don’t exactly know how, then contact me at suchidoc@gmail.com for a FREE discovery call to understand how my RelationSHIFT framework can transform your life! You can find all my contact information below.
This website uses cookies.