As a human being, there are always things you can do to improve how you live and interact with others that will improve your relationships and personal wellbeing.

Being a good person isn’t about constantly giving to others or sacrificing yourself for someone else.

Although the definition is arbitrary and can change person to person, it involves cultivating the skills to make others feel good and appreciated in your presence, and doing the right thing for its own sake and not for a reward.

Being the best person you can be takes practice with plenty of mistakes along the way.

Whether your goal is to inspire others through leading by example, or you just want to improve yourself for your own interests, here are some things that will help you through your journey.

3 Ways How to Be a Better Human:

1. Try to decrease how often you use your phone

The average American spends 4.5 hours a day on their phone and most of that time is spent scrolling through social media.

That’s a lot of wasted time.

With the exception of planned phone calls, meetings, and business activities, try limiting how much you use your smartphone and connect with friends instead.

Most people consider it rude to use a phone in certain public places, like restaurants, churches, and movie theaters.

However, it’s equally rude to be glued to your screen when you’re with friends.

It might feel completely normal to whip out your phone when spending time with other people, but it makes you less present with others, which can damage your relationships.

Besides, the more you use your phone around your friends, the greater the risk of it being damaged.

For instance, say a friend bumps into you and makes you drop your device.

If this happens, hopefully you’ve got a solid protective case for your phone so you don’t end up with a cracked screen.

However, if there’s any damage, you might feel angry toward your friend and that won’t be good for your relationship.

When you avoid using your phone while hanging out with friends, they will notice.

It will give you the opportunity to develop a stronger relationship with them and have deeper conversations that aren’t interrupted by notifications and other random sounds.

If you want more meaningful relationships in your life, you have to cultivate them from the ground up, which begins by being present with people instead of your phone.

2. Learn active listening

In a conversation, people want to be heard.

Really heard.

They don’t want to feel like the other person is ignoring their points or walking over them just to argue.

Making someone feel truly heard requires active listening, which is essentially the art of getting into someone else’s world for the purpose of understanding their communication even if you disagree.

There is a big difference between hearing the words someone speaks and genuinely listening.

For the most part, people having a conversation are almost always waiting to talk.

They’re taking in bits and pieces of what the other person is saying while forming ideas in their mind about what they want to say to either agree or refute some points.

Instead of getting the other person’s communication, they’re waiting for the first opportunity to jump in and share what’s on their mind.

Although it’s common and people are used to it, this isn’t a real conversation.

It makes people feel invisible and unheard.

To be the kind of person who makes others feel seen and heard, you need to develop active listening skills.

When you do, people will feel naturally comfortable around you and many will feel like you’re the first person who has ever truly listened.  

3. Ask clarifying questions

Nearly every point made in a conversation requires clarifying questions to be fully understood.

It helps to repeat what you think someone is saying to make sure you understand, and then ask additional questions to make sure you fully understand what they are (and are not) saying.

For example, you might say, “what I hear you saying is that you love spaghetti, but only on Thursdays if there’s fresh garlic.”

Then let the other person confirm or correct your perception.

From there, ask additional questions as needed to make sure you fully get their communication.

Strive to be the best version of yourself…

There is no right or wrong place to be in life.

You are where you are, and the good news is that you can always improve.

Whether you want to be a better listener, friend, coach, or neighbor, all the hard work you do on yourself will benefit yourself and the other people in your life.